My first submission into the state fair

How exciting.  I submitted 3 pieces into the evergreen state fair.  And I'll be doing a demonstration. 2 times.  Anything to help drum up business. It all helps.

I hope you are all well.  My next show besides the fair which is August 27- September 7, 2015. Will be ODDMALL Seattle.  The weekend before Thanksgiving.   I have to gear up for that.

That's all for now.  Thanks for visiting.

Well it is almost my 50th Birthday and yesterday I was looking for the card that my mother usually sends me.  She alway would send it early.  So that I would have it in time for my birthday.  But it didn't come and it will never come again. How sad that makes me. I will just have to go through my birthday card box and dig out all the cards that she has sent me in the past.  She would always sign it "Love Mummy".  I love you Mummy and Miss you very much.

I feel terrible and sad, and truly angered.  But I will not go on living that way as I know it really doesn't help.  I will see her again someday.  I have a lot of living to do.  So just more time to see things and do things and meet all kinds of people.  I do want to say that even with all the crap that Fred and I dish out to each other, we both feel very bummed out about not having Mummy around.  She has been such a big part of our lives.  You know I felt bad that I only had my dad for 18 years.  But I had my mom for 50.  Granted I would have liked it to be longer at least 2 more months.  But when God calls upon you, you must go. Unless you are stubborn and can't seem to follow the rules.  Which she was a rule follower.  Unlike me, to a degree that it.

Funny is that I keep hearing the ring tone of my phone in the background.  Off in the distance.  I heard it the whole time I was in Florida the week following my mother death.  It is one of the songs that Quentin Tarantino always puts in most of all his movies.   It is called the "Twisted Nerve Main Theme".  It is the one where they whistle through the whole piece.  It is ingrained in my head.  But my mom never did whistle very well.  Maybe it is my father letting me know they are thinking about me or that she is ok.

Well, off to clean the house, help the kid with school and if it is not raining walk the dogs.

Stay strong, love hard, and be good........to your siblings.  No matter who they are.

Well, time does keep ticking.  It has been 3 weeks since we buried my mother.  It hasn't been a rough as I anticipated.  I knew it wouldn't be.  You know the saying "Out of sight, out of mind"?  Well it is very true.  Although I do miss calling her and just saying hi.  She always knew when I was calling mostly at 8:00 pm my time and the 3 hour difference she knew it was me.  No one ever called at 11:00 pm her time.  I really miss that aspect of our relationship.  But I know I will see her someday.  Hopefully later than sooner.

So, I'm in the art show and I have these really cool and unique pieces that i made.  I sure pray they sell.  And if they do then I am heading down the right road.  But I have a lot to do.  So have a great day and be happy.

A poem for Mummy by Stacy

As I sit and wonder why,
All I want to do is to cry.
But you didn't want me to come to you.
You said you would be here in the month of June.

As I can see now that is not to be,
Something or someone needed you more
I sure hope it is not me.
Cause I would only be a bore.

I'm so sorry you had to leave so soon,
I will miss you deeply.
You have been such a huge impact on my life,
And Quite effectively.

I see a lot of you in me
I wonder why that is?
You have rubbed off on me through out the years,
With lots of laughter and lots of tears.

These words are not coming so naturally.
I'm struggling right along.
I wished I played an instrument
Then I could sing a song
But my talent does not lie there.
It lies within my hands.
I'm going off subject  now
It must be the ADHD.

Well I have know you just short of 50 years
Had lots of laughs and had lots of tears.
I couldn't have asked for another
Because you were MY mother.

I love you and miss you. And am sad I can't hug you anymore my short mummy.

Love, #3

Moms Memorial by Robin

So this is what Robin had to say about my mom for the memorial service.

Our mom was the proverbial hard candy,hard shell, soft inside. She was a good mom, a fair mom, and always encouraged us to be the best person we could be.  she always laughed with us, cried with us, got mad at us, for us, and with us, whenever we called her to talk about what was going on in our lives,

She had two wonderful men in her life.  Our father Manny and our stepdad Fred.  she loved our husbands, Andy George and Steven. Her grandsons Marc,  Bryan,  and Edison. And tolerated her grand dogs Maddie, Tug, Hero and dozer.  And the  late Josie, Foley and Jack.
  
Our mom was not an easy person at her best and quite difficult at her worst. However she loved us unconditionally and for that my sisters and I are forever grateful. As Stacy said to Rabbi Jacks yesterday morning,  her oft repeated advice to us was, be nice to your sisters.

We loved to shop together. It was most special when we visited individually and had our mom's undivided attention but it was equally and exceptionally fun when we were altogether. While I could really talk about our mom for hours I won't but I would like to share a few other things.

My husband Andy, (who couldn't  be here because he's recovering from throat cancer and is doing very well) was a fix up by my mom and a good friend who knew Andy's parents. He had just  relocated to Detroit and Janice  hocked him until he came for dinner one night. the rest is history. However, Fred's version is that she lined the three of us up and said
"take one...PLEASE!"  .

Stacy, our baby sister, loved how our mom was always, and I do mean always, on her side. Regardless of who our mom was arguing with or about whatever Stacy had at the top of her list

Laurie, our middle sister, was the one mummy relied on most. She still lives in Detroit and when Janice could travel, Laurie's  house was her personal hotel. They talked every day on the phone at least once if not more. Stacy, Fred and I, have now inherited those phone calls.

A few years ago I learned how to play mah-jongg and my mother used to love to hear how much I won and how much I lost.  I play a couple of older women in their 60s and one in their 80s. One night I played a hand I never have never played before.  For those of you who don't play, please bear with me.   For those of you who do play , it was in the top left corner of the card 1 N. 2 E. 3 W. 4 S. 2013. I picked my own Mahjong tile and, I had a jokerless hand.  I was so excited, I looked at my watch and saw that it was just 8 o'clock and I went "oh my god, oh my God"! I have to call my mom !  My friends said,  you can't call her now, it's 11 o'clock in Florida!   I said it's only 11 o'clock,  my mom is up!  so I called her and not only was she up but she was equally excited for my win.

Our mom always reveled in our successes no matter how big or how small and as you have heard me repeat,  our special nickname for her is MUMMY.  we love her, we miss her and she will stay forever in our hearts. 

The loss of my mother

Well, on April 5, 2014 around 8:45 am or so, my mother Janice, passed away.  I got the call from my sisters at 7 am my time as there is a 3 hour difference from where we all live.  My only regret is that I didn't get a chance to see her in the recovery stage. If I had I would have given her the blessing.  I know she was tired and just couldn't fight anymore.  She was weak and her body just couldn't handle the fact that it was not strong enough to carry on.  But her mind was still there and she didn't want to die.  She was a fighter.  In more ways than one.  But when the body says it is time then the mind just doesn't have enough say in the matter.

Needless to say I was shocked.  I did not expect to hear that but i knew that if the phone was ringing at 7 am on a Saturday morning then it was most likely bad news.  And indeed it was. I was planning on going to see her the following week and to sit in the rehab room with her all day and into the evenings just to be with her and get to know her a little bit more.

She was  81 years old and I am sure she was not ready to depart from this world.  My sister informed me the day before that I should make plans to fly out to Florida to see her.  I knew that if I was able to have been there that I could have said good-bye. I waited too long and she could not hold on.  Her body was just not cooperating with the control that she was imposing upon it.

Fred, my step father and I didn't think that she would have left us so soon.   We both had wishful thinking going on and thought that she would pull through this small obstacle that was blocking her way from living the way she had.  My older sister asked if she was giving up and she said sternly that she was NOT GIVING UP.  So that was encouraging. Good she was not ready to depart. So maybe I had time.

She was a stubborn woman with a flare for the sugar and spice.  You either loved her or not.  Either way, she would leave her mark.  She had a lot of love to give to her family and friends but hated waiting for things to happen.  Patience was not one of her virtues. But giving love and support to her children was.  She supported 3 girls emotionally, mentally and physically.

Unfortunately, she became a single parent at a young age of 49.  Nothing could have stopped what had happened.  On December 12, 1982, my father developed Acute Leukemia.  He was sick for 3 weeks and then gone. That left her holding the bag.  She was a working mom so she continued to work till she retired.  I was 18 at that time and was in my first term first year of college.  I am sure that she must have felt very lonely without 2 of her children to help her through this transition.  Laurie my older sister (the middle one) was living in California, but Robin the eldest was living at home with her and my father at the time.  I'm glad that my mother was not alone to have to deal with the pain of losing her husband.  They could grieve together.  Me, I went back to college to finish up my first year.

That following summer I became a camp counselor at an overnight camp.  Let me tell you that is not the best place to grieve the loss of a loved one.  Half way through the summer I needed to leave and go back home to be with my mom.  She could help me with the grieving process.  And she did. Because she loved me and knew I needed her guidance, she was able to help me get back on my feet.

By the time September of 1983 came, I was ready to start my 2nd year of college.  All smooth. Got my degree 7 years later and moved back home. But this time my mother had found Fred. He was smart as a whip and sharp as a knife.  They met through work.  He was now her partner in crime. She had found someone to share her life with.  Fred made her happy and in return I was happy for her.

Fortunately for me, she still stayed the same mother that she was.  Helping me in any way she could. She helped me pack to move out of the house, (guess she was ready to be an empty nester).  She taught me how to cook, clean and do my own laundry.  All that a good mother needs to teach her children.  She did let me fall on my face a lot.  Although I didn't learn all the time, she was always there to help me back on my feet.  Even if I made the same mistake 2 or 3 times.  She never pressured me into doing anything I didn't want to do.  But she never forced me to do anything that was good for me either.  I had to determine that for myself.  I don't know if that is a good thing of not.  She showed me what hard work can do and how it can all pay off in the long run.  I have to say that SHE NEVER JUDGED ME.  For either the way I lived or for the woman I became.  She did tell me often that she was proud of me.

Being the baby though did have its benefits.  I got more attention than the others.  She stuck up for me more often than I can remember.  Especially when I was arguing with Fred, my step-father.  It always made me feel good when she told him to shut up.  But I didn't always win the fight.  She was a great referee, always stuck up for her children.  Even though Fred was her husband, her children always came first.  And then the grandchildren.  She had 3.  Now Grandpa Fred has 3.  My mom would always send cards for our birthdays and even our wedding anniversaries.  She liked to make you feel special. She would send me pages from poetry books that she had found.  How much she loved me and how special I was and how proud she was of my accomplishments.  She was not a poet herself but when she found something to say what she wanted to say she either tore it out of the book or made a copy and then sent it with a Love Mom at the bottom.  I wish I had all of the poems that she gave me I would like to read them now.

So in short and wrap up,  She was a woman of great character and substance.  Quite diligent in her efforts.  Very smart, great speller and strong work ethic. She would give you the shirt off her back as long as she was comfortable and you were her friend.  She was always ready to give a strong shoulder to cry on or a disciplinary request when needed.

I sure miss her and I know she knows, I just wish I could have seen her before she left.  But she knows that I love her and always will.  But that doesn't change the fact.  I'm just glad I was able to have her for 50 years of my life.  She was my mother, friend and confidant.  She will be missed for the rest of my life.

Miss you My Dear Sweet Friend

Well It has been almost, how many years, 2. And I still think of you so often.  You had filled a gap in my life that is constantly missing.  And now I have trouble filling the void that you have left in my heart.  

I'm a lot lonelier without you in my life to bring a spark of light and happiness every time you called. Which my the way was really often.  Sometimes we would talk with in a 3 hour span like 5 times.  You were quite funny let me tell you.  Sometimes you didn't know or I didn't know if you were coming or going.  But I always knew where you were. You never moved from place to place.  And you love was always waiting for someone at the door. 

I miss those big old bear hugs you gave every time we came to visit you.  And whether you could easily stand or not the bear hug you gave when we were leaving. You always mustard up the strenght to get up and give some love.

I miss you Diane.  You were a large part of my life for a very short time. But I feel we will definitely be meeting up in another life if not in Heaven. 

I know it was one of your favorite holidays.  You could give to everyone without them thinking of ulterior motives. I wish you a Very Merry Christmas.  

God Bless you and God bless all my family and friends.

August 2, 2013.  Well last month a friend of Edisons had a near drowning accident and he almost died. Which is where near and almost come in.  It happened July 7th.  Well today we went to visit him for the first time since it happened.  We were both a tad nervous. But for someone that was on a ventilator it was not so bad.  Just don't know what to say. Except what we have been doing and not doing and wishing he were around to get my kid out of the house.  Edison has been spending so much time in the classroom that I think if is growing roots and planting them in the floor.

But is was nice to see Colten.  And scarry. To think that we almost lost a friend.  I didn't want that for Edison.  Not at 12.  It is one thing to lose a grandparent but something else to lose someone so young.

He should make a full recovery if not life may be a tad rough for Colten.  The doctors keep telling Sheri that kids are so much stronger than we think they are. And they are all impressed with how strong Colten is.

My kid never seize to amaze me.  His compassion and kind heart is so big. I know that Colten was happy to see him.

Sept. 11, 2012

School started for Edison today at P3.  He has algebra, science, English, drama and study hall.  Lots of homework will be going on around here.  they told me last week that I don't have to provide samples.l I am happy about that.  Last year I didn't have enough but was able to scrape by with way I had to give them.

So he is at school and am so tired. After I finish sorting the last bit in the classroom, I laid down on the couch with the dogs. Hero and Tug. I tried to sleep. I suppose I did get some rest.  After I got up we (the dogs and I) went for a walk. Stopped by to say hi to Ron and the come home to go get Edison and Eli.

After I picked up the boys from school I dropped Eli off and Edison and I proceeded to Jamba Juice to visit with Gena.  We had an adult conversation while Edison sat against the other wall doing homework.

It was a good adult play date.  Then we bumped into friend from Beauty and the Beast and she told us that auditions were today.  So we ran over to the school to sign up for Annie Jr.  But now that we are home Edison seems to have changed his mind. I don't think he will be having a good audition due to the fact that he is not prepared. I can't do everything for him now that he is almost 12 years old.

He has to want this.  He said he would like to do a song from Fiddler on the Roof but he is sitting in the other room watching TV. Hum. I don't know. I think we may just have a full schedule with out the drama class. Maybe we should wait for next spring to indulge in another musical.

I am tired and have to go cook dinner.  I would like to keep posting things here I will do more, more often. Good day.

Dreaming

Well, this morning I had a dream and Diane was there.  It was so nice to see her.  She looked the same as always.  Edison was there too.  I think she was telling me to let Edison have quality play time instead of yelling at him all the time.  The only thing with that is that he is not getting anything done in a timely manner. 

All I know is that it was nice to see her. 

OH and the other day I was using the iPad and I turned on the camera and hit the button to have the camera fast me and I thought I say something fly out of the frame from above my head behind me.  That was very peculiar. the image I saw was white of a sort.  But it moved so quickly out of the field ov vision I didn't have time to look up or even take a picture. 

Busy today, the in-laws are arriving Wednesday.

Sunny Days are here again

Well, this may be more like a diary then a blog with memories. But that is OK because I think I am the only follower for my own blog. 

The sun was shinning today and I thought about you a lot today.  I know you must have been watching over me yesterday because 2 things happened that only you or one other would have known that that would have bothered me if it went the other way.

I was propping the front door open to bring in the new dishwasher and you closed it for me because I forgot about the bees next that is right by the front door and we didn't want one of those huge bees flying in the house.  Thanks for closing the door. And your hotel mirror...Thank goodness it was facing the other other way when it closed the front door and landed on the floor face up.  I think if it would have landed face down it would have broken in to a million pieces. God knows I didn't need that bad luck.

Chatted with a friend of yours and he misses you too.  Hope you are having fun where ever you are Diane, I miss you.

OH and I miss you too Dad even though it has been like a life time since you died. Every time I mow the grass I think of you teaching me with the mower that had a cord.  Don't run over the cord. I can hear that in the back of my head.

Good night all.

My Father

My father passed away like some 30 years ago.  No we all know that time heals all wounds and that is pretty true in this case.  Granted the pain is not so severe but the thoughts of not having him around to see all my accomplishments is quite the downer. 

He never did see my future husband or any of my sisters either.  We were all late bloomers.  But in some way I feel he is watching over me and my family. 

To be continued.....

I miss you my friend forever

So, I met this elderly lady 4 years ago and I seemed like faith had stepped in and we became instant friends.  She called my her angel and she was one in return to me.  She always had kind things to say to me and never judged me for my mistakes or wrong doings.  She never judged anyone that came across her path.  Her name is Diane and she died January 1, 2012.

Here is a poem that I wrote for her a couple of months before she died.  I wanted her to know how I felt about her.  Just talking about her makes me miss her very much.

You are one in a million, 

Multiplied by two.
You are so dear to me,
It will help me carry through.

Our hearts are connected

By one single little thread.
Just to let you know that you
Are always in my head.

You have been such a bright spark,

In this little life of mine.
You are easy to love,
You really do shine.

So, I will look for you someday,

When I don’t know where to go.
Because I know you will help me,
You have such a loving soul.

I could not ask for a better friend,

Then the one you have become.
Your bright cheery voice on the phone
Is always welcome in my home.

My Dear Sweet Friend Diane,
I am so blessed to have known you

I want you to remember

You are loved by those who know you.

Sleep tight Diane. We will talk in the morning.

If you read this blog, I would love to hear all about that that special one that you lost in your life.  It helps remembering about them easier.  And if it hits you in the right spot it will release some well deserved endorphins.

We all need that release once in a while. It eases the tension that builds up within ones soul.

Thanks, Stacy